Home sweet home: what can you do if you miss home?

We are in the middle of a pandemic, it’s not easy! Sometimes it can hit hard. When it does, we need to remember to be gentle with ourselves. Let yourself feel for a bit. Keep in mind that it will pass and it’s ok to feel the way you do. It may also be a good time to reflect on what is going on inside your head. What are you really missing? Sense of connection, belonging, security, stability, routine, comfort…? Are you struggling with not being able to be physically present for your loved ones, missing out on good times or feeling the cultural gap even more? That’s perfectly ok. Now think about what you can do to address it. What do you need right now and is within your control?

Today we have so many ways to stay connected. Video calls and other ways to stay in touch with family and friends can help us to feel good. However, too much can make you feel the distance more. Find the right balance for you and your loved ones. Be aware that spending all day by your phone waiting for messages can multiply your feelings of loneliness. Same can happen if you spend your day scrolling on social media, you might be feeding your anxiety and sadness without knowing it.

Have you ever binge-watched Netflix the whole day? Nothing wrong with that as long as it doesn’t become a habit. Maybe it’s the only thing you want to do, but think about it: will it really help you to feel better? Yes taking care of yourself is important! Make sure to maintain a good routine. Sleep enough, eat healthy, exercise. Slow down, do nothing if you need or dance, listen to music, draw, read, keep a journal, go for a walk….anything that makes you feel good. However, self-care doesn’t only mean “bubble bath”. Sometimes self-care requires efforts, sometimes it means pushing yourself to do what will make you feel good in the long run, even if you don’t really feel up to it right now.

We miss home, we miss friends and family, we miss how it used to be, how it should have been, somehow we grieve….It’s ok, it takes time, some days we feel good, some days we don’t feel so good. Focus on what you have right here, right now. Try to make the best of your circumstances. Look at your blessings. Appreciate what you have. Why not make a list of 3 of your blessings every day?

It can be easy to compare ourselves to the people around us. However, remember that we are all unique and different. Comparing yourself with someone else can steal your joy and contentment but also a bit of your kindness and compassion, all things that we want to keep close. You might see people that seem to deal with so many more challenges than you and seem to cope better. That can be discouraging. You will also find people that seem to have everything going well in their life and are struggling. Then you can forget that kindness can go a long way. The keyword is “seem”. Like an iceberg we only see a little bit of someone’s life, there is so much more hidden beneath the surface. Your feelings…their feelings….are all valid. We all need a bit of compassion and understanding. It can make a big difference in your day and someone’s else.